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Growing Up: The Train That Can Never Stop

Life, Personal Growth, Spirit


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I’m 24 years old. I’m in the North Indian Himalayas. I’m sitting down for a private audience with one of Tibet’s most revered Buddhist teachers. After telling him how attached I am to my mother he looks at me straight in the eyes, smiles and gently says, “Well, you have to grow up now“. No seven words have ever hit me so hard.

This post is dedicated to all you people out there who are struggling with bitter sweet agony of growing up. I hope it gives you something to think about.

John Mayer and the train that can never stop

If you follow me on Twitter you will probably know that I am a fan of John Mayer. John is one of those rare artists that has an innate ability to put certain life situations into words. In fact, before I started listening to Mayer I would have argued that many of these emotions, desperate mental dramas and secret inner quandaries were unable to be described in ordinary language. They are simply too experiential to be categorized.

But John manages to. John reconnects me to those mental places with his lyrics. He does it time and time again. And although I am desperately trying to avoid these emotions (because they hurt), I find myself listening to Mayer again and again because it reminds me I am not unique. These emotions are, for the most part, universal to all humans. I have to thank John for that.

One John Mayer song that is not particularly critically acclaimed or even well liked amongst his fans is called Stop This Train. It is a song that, whenever I hear it, sends me back to that terrifying place of knowing that, really, we are alone growing up in this world. But, at the same time, it connects you with a feeling of hope because you aren’t the only one in that situation.

I ask everyone reading this post to watch an incredible solo performance of John singing this song here while taking a look at the lyrics here. Take five minutes out of your day to experience this song and everything it means to you because it gives this article a lot of context.

Crying, driving away in the dark


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There comes a point in everyone’s life when they realize there is no turning back. In the song Mayer uses the metaphor of driving away from his parents house, crying, in the dark. We have all had that moment. It might have been when you moved out or when you realized that you could beat your dad at table tennis. For a lot of people it manifests as an extremely empty and hollow realization.

The interesting thing is that some people are more equipped for this moment than others. Some people shut down and start to compensate for this lost youth in negative ways. Others embrace it and look forward to the future. Some people do both. But this moment is pivotal because it is the start of your adulthood. How you deal with this moment has a lot to do with whether you ever really grow up at all – and a lot of people don’t.

How to move forward and grow up


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I am not professing to have all the answers. I still struggle all the time with the idea that I am no longer at home with my mum eating her cooking and asking her for $10 to buy lunch with. I still struggle with the fact that she is going to die one day.

But since my conversation with that Buddhist Lama I have made some headway. I am stepping out on my own more and I am starting to enjoy it. Here are some tips on how to grow up well. Tips on how to drive away in the dark knowing that you are going to make it.

1. Accept it as soon as you can
Something you are going to need to do eventually is accept that there is no going back. You will have to accept this to grow up well. You can put it off or you can stand up tall and do it now. There is never any going back to the old days. The old days are like a dead person and you cannot revive a dead person no matter how much you long for them.

I encourage everyone who is struggling to grow up to accept fact that the past is gone and it is never coming back. Move forward. Its all you have.

2. Give up the memory reliving
If you are a healthy adult who has dealt with the growing up process well then there is nothing wrong with a little nostalgic reminiscing. But if you are buying sports cars, having affairs, trying to relive your youth or struggling with the depression of getting old then these memories can drive you mad. You need to give them up.

One of my worst traits is that I think to much. This inability to quiet my mind was one of the main reasons I was struggling to grow up. I would constantly play out the old days in my head, wishing, praying that I could go back to high school when things were simpler. But after I was gently told to “grow up” by my teacher I decided that it was time to leave these things behind and move on. And I have never been so happy.

The best way you can do this is by starting to become a little better at mediation. You don’t have to sit on a cushion and close your eyes but you do have to start becoming friends with your mind. Learn to watch your thoughts. Learn how they arise and subside without leaving any trace at all. When you do this they cease to control you.

3. Find out the cause
Often the pain associated with growing up can be linked to something else. Why are you feeling like this? Why are you missing the old days? If you can find another cause you might be able to get on top of those feelings.

For example, if you are really stressed because you think your wife is cheating on you then, undoubtedly, you are going to be longing for the old days where life was more simple. In this situation it isn’t the growing up that is causing the problem, it is some ancillary factor. Find out what is bringing these thoughts up and deal with it as soon as possible.

4. Don’t recreate
Trying to recreate the old days by going out with your mates all the time, skirting your responsibilities to your family, etc. is not going to solve the issue. A lot of people (men in particular) deal with the issue by not dealing with it. It is tempting here to grab you by your shirt collar and shake you while yelling, “Grow the F up man!” But of course that wouldn’t help.

We need to have a sense of honor in these situations by accepting the fact that we aren’t dealing with the problem very well. Trying to recreate the good ole days is not useful, nor will it make you feel better. As soon as you get in the cab to go home you will be back to that empty space. Recreating is living in the past and the past is a dead person. Remember?

5. Find good company
You are shaped in a big way by the people around you. If you are surrounded by 30 year old men who still wear their school jackets and go out drinking every night then you are going to go down with them. If, however, you hang out with people who are making progress, living and really trying to better themselves then you too will begin to move forward.

Finding good company is a massive part of growing up. It is a stark and bitter day when you realize that most of your buddies from high school are assholes and that you need new mates. You feel extremely alone. You have to find new people. But you will. And when you do you will be so much better off. Of course not everyone’s buddies from school are assholes. But a lot of the time they will hold you back because, as a group, you can just stay alive in the past.

6. Understand that things change
When the 16th Karmapa was on his death bed his students asked him to sum up his life’s experience and wisdom into one small teaching. After a brief pause he turned to them and simple said, “Things change”.

These two words are the quintessence of growing up. These two simple words summarize everything that you need to know about life. Things change and when you fail to grasp that truth you suffer. Nothing lasts and nothing stays the same. Embrace that chaos and find some peace by letting go.

Conslusion

So you have two options. You can fight to stop the train or you can go with it. As corny and cliche as it sounds, you really have to learn how to cope because there is no going back. Your youth is gone and all you have is now and, if you are lucky, the future. Have you grown up yet?

If you have any advice to give anyone or if you yourself have struggled with growing up please leave a comment and share your experience. It might really help someone.

Originally posted on July 31, 2009 @ 6:27 am

How to Live Longer: The Buddhist Practice of Saving Life

Inspiration, Spirit, Spirituality

piggie & dougie
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“No thing is as dear to someone as his or her own life, so no greater crime is there than taking life away. And no conditioned virtue brings greater merit than the act of saving beings and ransoming their lives.” – Chatral Rinpoche.

Many years ago in the Himalayas I met a Buddhist master who was a practitioner of tsethar; a Buddhist practice that involves saving the lives of animals. Buddhists assert that saving the lives of animals that are doomed to be killed increases ones lifespan, protects from certain illnesses and helps to remove obstacles in your life.

Over time I have come to appreciate this practice more and more and today I decided I would share it with you in the hope that some of you decide to take it up. It truly is one of the most beneficial things you will ever do with your time and money.

How does one perform this practice?

As far as practices go, this one is the easiest. You need no special training or implements, just a bit of cash and some spare time. The traditional way to carry out this type of activity is make sure you do three things:

  • The beginning: generate a compassionate motivation
    The first thing you need to do is develop some sort of compassionate motivation. For example, if you know someone who is sick you might generate the motivation that you are doing this practice to help them get better and live a longer life. Or, you might do the practice with the idea that you simply want to free sentient beings from suffering and fear and be a protector for those who need protection.

    The traditional Buddhist motivation is called bodhicitta. Bodhicitta is the wish that all beings will one day be free from suffering and never separated from happiness. When you arouse the motivation of bodhicitta you are also developing the warrior-like mentality of bravery; you yourself are going to free sentient beings from suffering without any help from anyone else.

  • The middle: Maintain a good attitude
    During the practice itself you should try to remember your motivation and not let too many self-centered thoughts enter your mind. This ensures that you really work with your mind and leave some positive imprints on your mental continuum. You should also try to concentrate single pointedly on what you are doing and not let your mind wander off too far.
  • The end: make vast aspirations and dedications
    Buddhists assert that good actions need to be dedicated to positive causes. This ensures that the merit is not wasted. At the end of this practice you should sit down for a few minutes and make as many vast and compassionate aspirations as you can. For example, you might dedicate saving the lives of these animals to the long life of you and your family members, the removal of disease and suffering in our society and the culmination of world peace. Or you might dedicate it to someone specific who is suffering from cancer or some serious illness.

    The dedication is super important. The bigger the better. Many of my teachers have said that during the dedication one should be as assertive and free thinking as possible; it is no time to be humble.

If you follow these simple guidelines I am confident that your practice of releasing lives will be extremely beneficial for yourself and others. Spending the afternoon purchasing and releases animals is an extremely joyous occasion and lots of fun for everyone involves.

What types of animals should I use?


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Short answer: it doesn’t matter. Any living creature that is about to be cooked or killed is suitable for this practice. Some animals that Buddhist monasteries use in this practice include:

  • Fish from Chinese restaurants and fish markets
    If you go in to almost any Chinese restaurant or fish market you will see tens of big fish swimming in the tank ready to be killed and served on a dish. These are perfect animals to free. Some times there will be crabs, lobster and eels – all suitable for this practice.
  • Crickets from pet stores
    Many pet stores now sell crickets that are bred to be fed to lizards and snakes. Often you can get 100 crickets for $5! That is a lot of positive karma.
  • Chickens from battery farms and suppliers
    Although the chickens from battery farms are not killed for food, they do live horrible lives in tiny cages. I am certain that there is a lot of good done every time one of these birds is taken from its cell to a nice big backyard pen.

Obviously you don’t want to go and buy a pet puppy and let it go in the woods. That isn’t the point! The point is to free animals who are about to have their life taken as the karma is considered to be especially potent.

It is extremely important, however, to only release animals that are native to the local environment. A lot of harm can be done by foreign fish when released into local waters. Here in Australia we have lost hundreds of local species of fish because English Carp were introduced into our rivers a hundred years ago. Make sure you do your research before letting animals go. Make sure they are locals.

The benefits of saving lives

There are many Buddhist texts out there that speak of some incredible benefits relating to this practice. Some of main ones include extending your life and the lives of others, healing and in some cases curing serious diseases, removing obstacles that are holding you back in life and so on. The main benefit (from a Buddhist point of view) is that you will create the causes to attain enlightenment in the very near future.

The Dalai Lama and other masters on saving lives
His Holiness the Dalai Lama has spoken of this practice many times, especially in his autobiography Freedom in Exile. In it he tells the story of how he would spend all monastery’s money as a young boy by purchasing sheep that were about the be slaughtered for meat. Thousands of sheep were spared the knife. At the end of the story he recounts that later in his life he saw in his meditation that this practice actually increased his life and will be a cause for him to live a long time.

One Buddhist master, Chatral Rinpoche, has been particularly outspoken on the issue of saving the lives of animals. He believes it should be a regular activity for all Buddhists and anyone who cares about living creatures. Here is a short poem he composed about the issue. And here is another text by a master called DoDrupchen on the benefits of saving animals. Finally, here is a fantastic resource on how to be creative with this practice as instructed by the 17th Gyalwa Karmapa.

My own experiences
I have been doing this practice for a few years now and every time I do it I enjoy it more. It is quite special knowing that you have freed living creatures from certain death, and, to be honest, I don’t really care if my life is extended or not. Knowing that I have done something positive for some helpless creature is enough for me.

That being said, my friends and I have done this practice on a large scale at several important junctions in our life. When my best friend had stage four cancer a few years ago we released a lot of animals. Things turned out a lot better than we had expected. He is in remission now.

Conclusion

I really do believe in the power of this activity. I would be extremely happy if only a handful of our community here at The Daily Mind took up this practice and dedicated the merit towards the peace and well being of all living creatures. If you do free some animals please stop back and leave a comment and let us know how it went.

Originally posted on July 29, 2009 @ 5:18 am

What Your Dreams Can Teach You About Being Awake (and Happy)

Personal Growth, Spirit


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We all dream. Some more than others. Some people will go off on fantasy journeys to far of lands where the imagination creates a smorgasbord of sensual pleasures. Other people will toss and turn the night over as they struggle to wake up from a nightmare that seems all too real. But what are your dreams teaching you? Are they teaching you anything at all? The answer lies within this post.

Can dreams predict your future?

We have all heard stories about people dreaming something that then comes true the next day. The television show Medium has made a lot of money telling the story of Allison Duboix, the psychic District Attorney’s assistant, who sees the killer in her dreams. And that is based on a true story. And for the record, I have no doubt in my mind that some people can actually predict future events based on their dreams. I am sure there are meditation masters out there who do it all the time.

But that is not what this post is about. In fact, the idea of looking at your dreams to try and extract some direct meaning is contrary to what I am talking about. I am talking about the symbolic nature of dreams. I am talking about the fact that your dreams are a microcosm for your whole life and, if you choose to, you can learn a lot about being awake from what happens when you are asleep.

What your dreams can teach you about being awake


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So what can your dreams teach you about being awake and living in the real world? What lessons can we take from our pillow out into our daily life? Quite a few actually. Here are a few ideas I picked up from my Buddhist teachers as well as a lifetime of being a “creative” dreamer.

1. Dreaming teaches you about impermanence
The first thing you can learn quite directly (and sometimes painfully) from dreams is that everything is impermanent. I remember being a young man in high school and dreaming of beautiful women that I was madly in love with only to wake up with the stark realization that these women were gone. We were lovers in the dream state but as soon as I woke up they were no longer there. The impermanence hit me hard.

The same is true of life. Nothing lasts. Trees, boats, clouds, life, love, hatred… everything is impermanent. Nothing composite can stay together. Nothing that goes up can resist from coming down. Dreams give you a very tangible insight into impermanence.

So what’s the point? Why learn this lesson? Well, if you can remember that feeling of impermanence you will become less attached to things which you know cannot last. And that gives you an amazing sense of freedom. When you can enjoy someones company without worrying about holding on to them you are much more open to the whole experience. The fear is gone. You know it is going to end and as such you enjoy it for what it is.

2. Dreaming teaches you to open your mind
The most powerful thing you can learn from dreaming is how to open your mind. When you live your life with an open mind you are more relaxed and happy and you are less likely to be affected by things that are, always, impermanent. Let me explain.

Let’s say you are dreaming about being in love with a beautiful woman. You can smell her hair and feel her soft skin. You talk to her about wondrous things and you go on sensual adventures together that seem to last a long time. It is so real. And then you wake up. All of a sudden you realize how unreal the experience was but still you are upset that you have lost her.

It is EXACTLY the same as real life.

In real life we fall in love and grasp and cling to beautiful women, good food, our homes and family and our points of view. But this clinging is silly because we are clinging to things that don’t last. It is just like the dream state only longer. How silly is the person who clings to something that happens in a dream? Why? It seems real at the time. It seemed like it would last forever at the time. But it doesn’t. And it doesn’t in the waking world either.

Similarly, when you are asleep and dreaming even the most crazy ideas seem real. You could be best friends with a four eyed dancing bear that had an ear for a mouth. It is ridiculous to the awake person but real to the dreaming person. So perhaps our waking perceptions are not that realistic either. If we can dream up nonsense in our sleep then perhaps our waking thoughts are not all that on target either? Open your mind up to the world because your perception is not always correct.

3. Dreams teach you to let go of your worries
Are you one of those people who dwells all day on the dream you had last night? Do you sit and try to relive the experience and try to ascertain every meaning from every little thing that happened? I used to be like that. Not anymore.

In a dream you could have a problem that seems so terrible and real. Or, you could be dreaming something that, upon waking, has something to do with an important area of your life. And it worries you. You worry about the dream coming true or whether it is a prophecy of things to come. But you know what? You won’t be able to figure it out until it happens. So drop it.

The same is true of waking thoughts.

All day long we play mind games. We carry out scenarios in our head trying to figure out the best course of action to take. But ultimately this mental chatter just makes us stressed. It doesn’t get us any closer to a solution. So drop it. Your dreams are just dreams and your thoughts are just thoughts. Worry about it when it happens.

Conclusion

Dreams really do give us an excellent insight into the human mind. They show us that our perceptions are not as solid and real as we think they are and that all thing are impermanent. If you take these lessons to heart your awake life will be more spacious, open and free. Don’t cling to dreams – not when you are asleep and not when you are awake.

Originally posted on July 17, 2009 @ 3:40 am

What Has Michael Jackson’s Death Taught You?

Personal Growth, Spirit


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I have never seen anything like it. Michael Jackson. Dead. Twitter goes crazy, people rally in the streets to sing his songs and a whole generation of fans cry for their lost hero. It is quite incredible. Michael Jackson was, to me, almost a mythical figure. His fame and charismatic presence left me in awe but at the same time I felt sickened by the accusations of pedophilia.

I didn’t want to write a post about this initially for fear of seeming like I was just trying to “get in on” the commotion. But I have been quite affected by the death of Michael Jackson and, listening to his songs the past few days, I have realized that this man has taught me quite a lot.

What Michael Jackson taught me: the music that changed my life

I don’t want to gloss over the pedophilia; it is an extremely serious matter. And I think people make excuses for Michael far too often. But the fact of the matter remains, he was never convicted of such crimes and as a result we are obliged (in some countries at least) to consider him innocent. If he did do these terrible things I can’t begin to describe how disappointed it would make me feel. I honestly hope the rumors are just rumors.

But despite all of his misgivings, he was an amazing man. He has sold more albums than any other person in history and has dozens of songs that have changed people’s lives forever. Listening to his music over the past few days I have realized just how big a part of my life Jackson has been.

Here are a few songs that have literally changed my life. This is how I want to remember him:

The death of biggest star of all time

He could stand on a stage and make people faint without moving an inch. His music sells more than any other artist. His songs have changed the music industry. His dancing has changed dancing. He was a star like no other. And now he is dead.

So I want to know, what has Michael Jackson taught you? Have you learned something from his music or from his death? How has this latest news impacted you? Please leave a comment.

Originally posted on July 2, 2009 @ 6:36 am

How to Make Every Minute of Your Life Meaningful

Inspiration, Mind, Mindfulness, Spirit


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“My religion is to live and die without regret.” – Milarepa

Something that scares me more than anything else is dying with regret. I don’t want to look back on my younger years wishing I had done something differently or wishing that I hadn’t hurt this or that person. Regret scares me. And the only way to live and die without regret is to find a way to make your life truly meaningful. When your every action, thought and word has meaning you will find that your death (and indeed your life) will be a very peaceful process.

In this post I am going to give you some ideas about how you can discover the secret to making every minute of your life meaningful.

Is your life meaningful?

Take a second to do a little “meditation” with me. I want you to take your hands off the mouse and just spend two minutes imagining your death. Imagine you are laying on your bed with your family around you. Imagine you have only five or six breaths left before you depart to the next world. How do you feel? Do you have regrets? Are you afraid?

Some people get really angry when I talk about death. They send me emails asking me to stop talking about this terribly taboo subject. I find this attitude really sad because death is the one thing we can be sure of in this world. Nothing else is certain, but our death is. No one in the history of the planet has ever avoided death. Everyone has to go through it. So why, then, is everyone afraid of preparing for it?

Don’t be someone who is afraid of death. Do the meditation and really try to imagine what it is going to be like. How do you feel? If you find you are afraid, anxious or regretful then I can guarantee you aren’t living your life the way you intended. You aren’t making every minute meaningful. By looking at death we can get a great insight into our life.

How to make every minute of your life meaningful


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You are probably like me. You want to live and die without regret. So how do we do that? How do we make every minute of our existence count? Here are some ideas.

1. Make your life about others
The most important thing you can ever do is make your life about other people. Our world is so self-centered. We are brought up to believe that we are more important than everyone else and that we need to take care of our own needs and wants before the needs and wants of others. But after a while we realize that we feel kind of empty. That’s when we have the midlife crisis. The crisis occurs because we realize that we have spent our whole lives working to make ourselves happy but we still feel crap.

The great Buddhist master Shantideva said:

“All the suffering in the world comes from wanting happiness for oneself. All the happiness in the world comes from wanting happiness for others.”

It is one of the truest quotes you will ever read. A life spent helping others is a life well spent. And when your time comes to an end there will be no regrets because you have used your time well. You have made a contribution.

2. Don’t procrastinate
A few months ago I wrote an article designed to help you stop procrastinating. I believe that procrastination is one of the worst things a human being can do. If you want to make every minute of your life meaningful you have no time to procrastinate.

Think about the last five years of your life. How fast have they zoomed by? I remember my first day of high school as if it were yesterday and it seems as though I have achieved very little since then. I have spent too much time procrastinating. And this is a cause for regret.

We hear it all the time but we never take it in. Life is short. It will be over in the blink of an eye. And to make matters worse, you have no idea when your life is going to end. You could die of a heart attack in your 80’s or you could die from cancer in a week. You could get hit by a bus. So now ask yourself this: if you knew you had only five years left would you change the way you are living? I bet most of us would.

3. Don’t get angry
Anger, it is said, is the worst of all the negative emotions. The Buddha once remarked that a single moment of anger can destroy 100 years of good deeds. I can see how this can be so. Lots of bad things happen because of anger – violence, rape, wars, etc. And the bad thing about anger is that you always end up regretting it.


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Think about the last time you got angry and acted on it. You might have yelled at your partner or a coworker. How did you feel five minutes later? Did you feel vindicated and justified or did you feel heavy and burdened? I am betting it was the latter. Every time I have said or done something in anger I have come to regret it. Life is too short for anger.

Angry people don’t succeed in life. They sabotage their happiness and they end up living very lonely and shallow lives. Take a look at any friend you have that is constantly angry. They are never happy. They are always frowning and they get no joy from life’s simple pleasures. Anger is the worst thing you can do. Don’t become one of those people who finds the worst in every situation. Look for the best.

Conclusion

Life is so short and fleeting. You could die in your sleep tonight. Make sure you live your life in a way that will allow you to pass away with no regrets. Make compassion, love, patience and energy the main pillars of your existence. If you do you will leave behind a wonderful legacy.

So now the question is; are you making every minute of your life meaningful? What is holding you back? Leave a comment and let us know. I would be very interested to see what the main problems are.

Originally posted on May 8, 2009 @ 3:05 am

Why Do You Still Hate Your Job?

Inspiration, Life, Spirit


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You get up every day with a frown on your face. Grab your towel, drudge down the hall to the shower. Get dressed, eat some breakfast, kiss your kids goodbye and walk out the door. In half an hour you’ll be back at the job you hate. Tomorrow you will do it all again.

But why?

Why do you continue to work in the job you hate? Why do you get up every day of your life and spend eight precious hours doing something you resent? In this post I want to take a look at this common phenomenon and try to give you some suggestions to change your attitude towards work. It is time to stop hating your job.

30,000 hours of misery

I know people who have been in the same job for 20 years and have hated every minute of it. Now lets assume they work five days a week and 45 weeks of the year. That means they have spent around 30,000 hours doing something they hate. What a waste. What a waste of the precious time that we have on this planet.

Should I quit?

This article is not really about quitting your job. It is more about learning to love your job. But lets be honest. If you hate your job so much that you feel like there is nothing you can do to change it then it is time to quit. Be brave, start looking for other career options and then hand in your resignation letter.

When it comes to the end of your life you do not want to look back and say, “I spent 30,000 hours in a job that I hated. I wasted my life.” Stop thinking about all the reasons not to quit (mortgage, financial crisis, etc.) and find a way to make it happen.

Learning to love your job

I honestly believe that we need to do more to learn to love our jobs. It is not enough to just go to work and go home every day – we need to try and make that experience more rewarding. Its time to stop hating your job. It is time to realize that your own attitude can make a big difference to your happiness. Here are some suggestions.

1. Recognize how lucky you are
Seriously, we have it pretty good in the West. We have quite nice job laws that protect us in many ways. We get a regular pay check. And we get to go home to a house. Not a shanty or a plastic tent, an actual house.

It is time to start recognizing how lucky you are. Why spend your whole life cursing your situation when, in actual fact, your situation is pretty good?

2. Be more grateful
Similar to number one is learning to be more grateful. A lot of workers go about their daily business thinking that somebody owes them something. The boss owes them more pay. The payroll officer owes them more overtime. The Board owes them a promotion. No. They don’t. Nobody owes you anything. That is your own expectations talking.

Instead of thinking that the world owes you something why not be grateful? Be grateful for the number of hours you got this week. Be grateful that you have a dental plan. Be grateful that you made it to work alive, even if you weren’t driving a Mercedes. Learning to be grateful is one of the most important things you can do if you want to change how you view your work.

3. Think of all the opportunities it has created
When I was just out of high school I really wanted to go to India to meet some Buddhist masters. But I was broke. So, I got a job as a cleaner in the dirtiest pub in town cleaning up 20 year old’s vomit, cigarette butts and a whole lot of other junk. For a few weeks I hated it.


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Over time, however, I realized that this job was enabling me to go on a journey of a lifetime. It was due to that job that I traveled to India and went to some of the most amazing places on the planet. I met great meditation masters and found friends that have loved and cared for me ever since. I will never forget sitting at the Dalai Lama’s teaching hall and watching him smile and wave as he walked past and thinking, “Wow! That shitty cleaning job just allowed me to meet the Dalai Lama himself.”

Your job has probably bought you a house, nice food, a car, medical care, etc. It has probably allowed you to do things that you never thought you would do. Think about those things.

4. Realize it is your own fault
I want to introduce you to a Buddhist teaching from a book called the Seven Points of Mind Training. In that book it says “condense all blames into one”. What this means is that anytime a bad thing happens to you it is your own fault.

Now why is it our fault? Well from the Buddhist point of view it is like that because we have created the karma that caused that condition to come around. A very simple example might be that you now have a bad job because you slacked off in high school.

Whether you “believe” the karma theory it is a useful slogan to use in your work life. The next time something bad happens to you think “condense all blames into one” and move on. Don’t get angry at the person or the situation, just consider that it is your fault and move on.

This is a fantastic way to live your life as you are no longer getting angry with the world around you. You now realize that your happiness depends on you. You and no one else. If you want something to change you need to change it. If a bad situation occurs it is up to you to rectify it.

Conclusion

So why do you still hate your job? Why do you still go to work every day and refuse to be happy? Will you attempt to change that attitude? Once you go to work with the positive attitudes mentioned above I can guarantee your life will be more meaningful.

If you have any other suggestions please leave a comment and let us know. It might really help someone.

Originally posted on April 6, 2009 @ 10:28 pm