life lessons – Page 2

What Tibet’s Greatest Ever Yogi Can Teach Us About Living Life

Milarepa

His name was Milarepa and he was a murderer. The start of this yogi’s life was marred by violence, hatred and revenge. But mention his name to any Tibetan and their eyes will well up with tears of devotion and joy. For this is a story about change. This is a man who recognized his flaws and mistakes and turned his life around. This is a man who became the greatest yogi the world has ever seen.

Who was Milarepa?

The murders
Milarepa was born into a wealthy family in the snowy land of Tibet in 1052. Early on in his teenage years his father passed away and, with no one left to control the estate, his aunt and uncle stole his entire inheritance. Filled with rage and hatred the young Milarepa went away to learn various dark arts and soon returned to murder them. In fact, it is said that the vengeful Milarepa was so angry that he killed 35 people in his uncle’s village on the night of the revenge.

Meeting his Guru
Soon after these dreadful events Milarepa’s life started to fall to pieces. He had reached an extremely dark place and realized very deeply that his life had turned out all wrong. He was ashamed of who had become and what he had done to his family. He realized the grave mistake he had made.

So he set out to make things right. On his quest of redemption Milarepa met a man named Marpa who had brought all of the Buddhist teachings to Tibet from India. Marpa had endured great hardships to bring these teachings back and it is said that without Marpa the Buddhist teachings would not have survived in the land of snows.

The moment Milarepa first saw Marpa was magic. Legend tells us that Marpa was out in a field having a drink and Milarepa passed him on the road. When his eyes first fell on Marpa the whole world stood still and the hairs on the back of his neck stood on end. Milarepa had no idea who the man was but due to their strong connection from past lives it is said that Milarepa experienced a deep state of meditation by just looking at Marpa.

The great hardships that Marpa put him through

Pictured: the final tower built by Milarepa

Milarepa studied with many Buddhist masters but none of them seemed to be able to help him. In his heart he knew had to study with Marpa. So he went back to ask Marpa and asked for help but Marpa just scolded him and chased him away. Each time Milarepa requested teachings the wrathful Marpa would beat him and kick him out. Finally, though, he gave in and made a deal with Milarepa:

“Build me a large tower and I will teach you the Dharma,” he said.

So Milarepa set to work. He gathered stones and rocks and wood from all over the country side. After many weeks of backbreaking labor Milarepa went back to Marpa and told him the tower was complete. Marpa went to inspect the work and upon seeing it started yelling at Milarepa telling him that he had done it all wrong and that he needed to start again!

This went on nine more times.

The last tower Milarepa built was nine stories high and took many months to complete. Remember, this was before cars, cranes and cement mixers. It took such a toll on his body it is said that he had open sores all over his back and that he was now a hunch back from carrying all the rocks. But he did it. And his dedication to Marpa never wavered. He wanted the teachings so much.

After the last tower was built Milarepa stumbled back to Marpa’s house where the teacher was giving some advanced teachings to some other yogis. Milarepa fell on the floor by Marpa’s feet and begged for teachings. But, as always, Marpa told him to go away.

Completely at his wit’s end Milarepa decided to kill himself. He had murdered 35 people and without the teachings of the Buddha he felt there was no way he could make things right and no way to benefit those dead people. So he hung a rope on a tree and put it around his neck. He took a deep breath and braced himself and just as he was about to step to his death Marpa approached and said that he was now ready to receive the highest teachings of Buddhism. Marpa had accepted him as a disciple.
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Originally posted on November 26, 2008 @ 10:05 am

Lessons From India 3: Dealing With Hardships

Inspiration, Life, Mind, Mindfulness, Spirit, Travel

photo credit: Kannan Kartha

“There is no vice like anger and no virtue like patience.” – Shantideva

As you all know I am currently in India on my yearly battery re-charging holiday. One of the best and most important things you learn in India is how to deal with hardships. In this post I want to give you some tips so that you might be able to better deal with your own personal hardships when you next encounter them.

Dealing with hardships – the Buddhist approach

I want to give you some of the Buddhist methods for dealing with hardships. This makes sense because I am here studying buddhism and meeting with my buddhist teachings. These methods are therefore the freshest in my mind.

Using patience
The first method of dealing with hardships is to develop patience. The old master Shantideva used to talk about how hardships have no solid reality. They aren’t intentionally trying to hurt you so why do you get angry with them?

Shantideva also used to use the example of mucas. He would ask his students why they don’t get angry at mucas and other illnesses but you get angry at other circumstances that are causing you hardships. He said this was illogical because both are due to causes. That is, nothing that causes you hardships has a solid reality – nothing is inherently trying to make you suffer.

So… be patient.

Meditating on karma
Another method that buddhists use to deal with hardships is meditation on karma.

Buddhists assert that everything that happens to us is because of things we have done in past lives. For example, if we are sick it might be due to something we did in previous lives that left that imprint on our mindsteams.

When hardships occur it is then considered to be a positive thing. The reason for that is that the negative karma is being purified. If bad things happen because of bad things we have done then when we experience hardships we are exhausting the cause for bad things to happen for us. Therefore it is a positive event.

While this may be too farfetched for some western mind’s to accept it is a useful thing to contemplate the next time we are undergoing some hardships. It helps us to be less selfish and self centered and stops us from becoming someone who blames everyone else around them when things go wrong.

Meditating on compassion
Compassion is the king of all meditations. The whole point of buddhism is to get people to become more compassionate.

When you are undergoing hardships it is a great time to develop compassion. You can think that there are other people undergoing similar things to me and arouse compassion in your mind thinking how horrible it is that other people have to feel this crap.

When buddhists get sick we have a short aspiration that we recite that helps us make our compassion more limitless and less ego driven. It goes:

“May all the sufferings of all sentient beings ripen on me right now. May I take on their pain so that they don’t have to.”

This is a powerful thing to do because for the first time in a long time we are putting other people ahead of our own needs.

These are only a few methods but they are some of the most important that you can encounter if you want new ways to deal with hardships.

Originally posted on July 20, 2008 @ 11:45 am

Gordon Ramsay: 4 Lessons this Angry Chef Can Teach You About Success

Inspiration, Personal Growth, Spirit

Gordon Ramsay

Gordon Ramsay is an angry man. He is also a very inspiring man who knows a lot about the hospitality industry. In his massively popular television series, Ramsay’s Kitchen Nightmares, he takes God forsaken eateries and turns them in to five star restaurants. Love him or hate him he knows how to do his job.

In this article I want to take a look at a few lessons Gordon Ramsay has taught me about the pressures and stresses of my work and how to turn them into success.

What Gordon Ramsay can teach you about work success

1. When you are wrong, admit it
One of the first things you notice about the show is that Gordon Ramsay goes after people who don’t admit they are wrong the hardest. He rides their backside until they either cave in and start crying or they storm out and quit. In Ramsay’s restaurants there is only room for those people who are willing to learn and grow and if you are not ready to admit that you were wrong you are going to lose out.

In this video you will see Chef Ramsay go to town on a French Chef who won’t admit that he was wrong. It starts a huge argument and the two almost have a fist-fight. In the end Ramsay walks out and the chef misses out on an opportunity to learn from one of the most successful restaurant owners in the world.

Sometimes it is better to leave your ego at the door and admit that you are wrong. [Read more…] about Gordon Ramsay: 4 Lessons this Angry Chef Can Teach You About Success

Originally posted on April 10, 2008 @ 8:00 am

What Britney Spears Can Teach You About Career Moves

Inspiration, Spirit

Britney Spears is the self proclaimed embodiment of the lifestyle of the rich and famous. She has achieved huge success, fame and wealth. She has also started to lose the plot. In this article I want to take a [painful] look at what Britters can teach us about a good career moves.

What can Britney Spears teach you about career moves

We should probably do the opposite of everything mentioned here.

1. When you start something, don’t finish it
In 2007 Britney Spears checked into a fancy rehab clinic. She was preparing to get off the drugs and alcohol and needed help. She was preparing for a long, tough and agonizing journey.

She checked out the same day.

If you want to quit a bad habit or develop a new good habit it is important to give up as soon as it gets hard.

2. Don’t face up to your misdeeds, even if there were witnesses

Britney hitting a parked car and driving away

Earlier in the year Britney drove her car into another car and then drove away without leaving a number, insurance details, etc. The problem was, there were hundreds of paparazzi cameras flashing away; the whole thing was caught on camera.

This teaches us the importance of not being honest and not caring about other people’s property. It also shows that we should never face up to things that we have done wrong, even when there are witnesses.

3. Disrespect those who influence your future
When Britney Spears was in court for one of her many criminal acts she proceeded to call the judge who was about to decide her sentence an “old fart”.

This is a good idea for all of use who want to get ahead. Don’t suck up to people, make fun of them and call them names!

4. Give only 50% at important work gatherings

Britney Spears comeback performance

Remember when Britney finished her stint in rehab and had to give a come back performance for her new album? She got up on stage in a tight bikini looking perhaps a little overweight, tired and possibly high. It was not a pretty sight. Everyone felt sorry for her and really didn’t enjoy the performance.

This lessons shows us how important it is to make little to no preparations and then give only 50% of your best when it counts.

5. If in doubt, kiss Madonna
Some people have said that the kiss with Madonna was the beginning of the end for Britney. It was after this that her drug abuse worsened, she married a few deadbeats in Vegas, released a greatest hits album (already!), checked in and out of rehab and more.

Britney was now showing the world that everything she had said before about her morals, ethics and religion was no longer important. All of that could be forgone for some ratings.

Conclusion on Britney’s career moves

We all laugh and joke about Britney but in reality I think we have lost sight that this girl is in serious trouble. She is mentally unwell and obviously not happy. The sad thing is that is the we as consumers who created this. Her life is public because we can’t get enough of the gossip.

But I ask you: what is so good about this woman that you want to keep looking? Nothing she does is worthy of attention.

The reason for writing this post was 1) to have a bit of a laugh and 2) to show that everything that we do has a consequence. Little girls are learning from Britney and will grow up thinking that she is a role model. Is your career so important that you would be unethical to get to where you want to be?

“Be very mindful of everything that you say for those very words could establish someone on the path to success or failure.” – Unknown.

Originally posted on March 29, 2008 @ 6:03 am

The Art of Taking Your Life as Your Teacher

Inspiration, Personal Growth, Spirit

“In three words I can sum up everything I’ve learned about life: it goes on.” – Robert Frost

The day I finished school I packed my bags, borrowed some money from my mother and got on a plane to the Himalayas. I needed a teacher. I needed someone who could help guide me in my life, help me to make sense of the world I was living in. And after a few months of frightening train rides, painful illness and agonizing angst I found my teacher. As I sat there in a crowd of students listening to his talk I picked up on a very stark theme – you must become your own teacher.

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7 Things Star Wars Can Teach You About Life and Politics

Inspiration, Life, Spirit

I was watching Star Wars: Revenge of the Sith last night and was amazed at the depth of wisdom and good advice that comes out of some of those characters. Yoda is like an old Buddhist master, Obi-Wan Kenobi is like an experience Samurai warrior and so on. There is also a lot of political pundit banter that goes on between the Council and the Dark Side. Inspired by this re-run I went through some of the old movies and found some of the best quotes and lessons that can teach us a thing or two about life and politics.