Some days you just feel like no one at work is your friend. You might know a lot of people but none of them really know you – none of them get you. In this post I will take a look at how you can build some true friends in your workplace.
To make true friends at work you must:
1. Give people time
If you do not give people any of your time it is unreasonable to expect them to like you. People need time to understand what you are about and who you are. Sometimes all it takes is a coffee and a really good chat to get to know someone. Other times it will take many weeks and months of hard work. Don’t be afraid to give some time.
2. Be honest
There is no point telling someone you are really good at playing snooker if you aren’t. It is dishonest and it will wind up getting you into trouble next time you are at the local pub and your new friend wants to play pool! Be honest with the people you want to make friends with. You always bond closely with people if you share the same interests.
3. Be open
Never be afraid to express who you are and what you feel about a certain topic. If you feel like George Bush is a bit of a war criminal you should be clear cut about it. Being open allows people to see what its going to be like being around you. More often than not they will like you for who you are.
4. Bring food
Whatever situation you might be in it is very important to use food as a friendship builder. Billion dollar businesses have been founded over lunch. Best friends are made over a coffee and a snack. Food is a friendship builder. If you are working late nights at the office try ordering in a pizza and sharing it with everyone without making them pay. This one act of generosity can work magic.
5. Don’t make fun
Quite often people think all jokes are created equal. They aren’t. While you and your already established mates might like to make fun of each other it is quite often the case that a “new” friend will not understand. All it takes is one seemingly harsh comment and you have blown any chances you might have had. If you are going to make jokes, don’t make them personal.
6. Organize things and follow through
Some of my best friends are the ones who got my cell number on the first meeting because we expressed some interest in doing something together. Sometimes it was an indoor soccer team, sometimes it was just going out for a drink. People love seeing that you pay them some interest. Don’t always wait to be asked out, start doing the asking.
There are so many ways to make friends. It does not matter what tricks you learn the best thing you can do is be honest and open and don’t be afriad to start a conversation. Relax and be natural.
Originally posted on March 6, 2008 @ 8:52 am