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Daily Steps To Mindful Living

Mindfulness

Lessons From India 3: Dealing With Hardships


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“There is no vice like anger and no virtue like patience.” – Shantideva

As you all know I am currently in India on my yearly battery re-charging holiday. One of the best and most important things you learn in India is how to deal with hardships. In this post I want to give you some tips so that you might be able to better deal with your own personal hardships when you next encounter them.

Dealing with hardships – the Buddhist approach

I want to give you some of the Buddhist methods for dealing with hardships. This makes sense because I am here studying buddhism and meeting with my buddhist teachings. These methods are therefore the freshest in my mind.

Using patience
The first method of dealing with hardships is to develop patience. The old master Shantideva used to talk about how hardships have no solid reality. They aren’t intentionally trying to hurt you so why do you get angry with them?

Shantideva also used to use the example of mucas. He would ask his students why they don’t get angry at mucas and other illnesses but you get angry at other circumstances that are causing you hardships. He said this was illogical because both are due to causes. That is, nothing that causes you hardships has a solid reality – nothing is inherently trying to make you suffer.

So… be patient.

Meditating on karma
Another method that buddhists use to deal with hardships is meditation on karma.

Buddhists assert that everything that happens to us is because of things we have done in past lives. For example, if we are sick it might be due to something we did in previous lives that left that imprint on our mindsteams.

When hardships occur it is then considered to be a positive thing. The reason for that is that the negative karma is being purified. If bad things happen because of bad things we have done then when we experience hardships we are exhausting the cause for bad things to happen for us. Therefore it is a positive event.

While this may be too farfetched for some western mind’s to accept it is a useful thing to contemplate the next time we are undergoing some hardships. It helps us to be less selfish and self centered and stops us from becoming someone who blames everyone else around them when things go wrong.

Meditating on compassion
Compassion is the king of all meditations. The whole point of buddhism is to get people to become more compassionate.

When you are undergoing hardships it is a great time to develop compassion. You can think that there are other people undergoing similar things to me and arouse compassion in your mind thinking how horrible it is that other people have to feel this crap.

When buddhists get sick we have a short aspiration that we recite that helps us make our compassion more limitless and less ego driven. It goes:

“May all the sufferings of all sentient beings ripen on me right now. May I take on their pain so that they don’t have to.”

This is a powerful thing to do because for the first time in a long time we are putting other people ahead of our own needs.

These are only a few methods but they are some of the most important that you can encounter if you want new ways to deal with hardships.

Originally posted on July 20, 2008 @ 11:45 am

How to Work a Job and Still Attain Your Life’s Goals and Dreams

Lately I have been thinking a lot about my job and how it seems to get in the way of the work I need to do to achieve my life’s goals. However, I need the job as it pays my rent and supports some of my hobbies. So how do you work a job while still trying to attain your goals in life?

How to work a job and still attain your goals in life

Music star, professional athlete, novel writer, home owner… everyone has a dream or a goal that they want to attain in this life. Here are some tips to help you work towards that goal while still working a day job.

1. Sleep when you are dead

“I never sleep cos sleep is the cousin of death…” – Nas

One of the hardest lessons to learn is that if you really want to attain a goal in life while working another job you need more hours in the day. This is probably going to mean that you will sleep less and work harder but getting up early is something that has to be done.

The above quote is one of my favorite quotes of all time and it comes from New York rapper Nas. It is a very profound quote and shows us the link between sleep and death. We have one life to do something meaningful. One precious opportunity. What waste it sleeping?

You can sleep when you are dead.

2. Write down your dreams
When you write down a dream that you have you turn into a goal. You make it something concrete and achievable. A dream is something that is a little bit far out and unreachable but a goal is something that you can actually get to.

If you feel like your work is getting in the way of your goals then write them down. Having something visual in front of you will help you get all those thoughts out of your head and let you calm down and assess the situation. Write down your dreams so you know exactly what you are trying to achieve.

3. Give your goals a time line
The next thing that you need to do to turn those dreams into concrete goals is give them a time line. When you affix a date to some dream you turn it into a goal that is now becoming a reality.

For example, if you say that you want to be able to play the guitar by the time you are 30 you have a much more specific goal than if you just said you’d love to be a good guitar player. By saying that you want to do it by 30 you now have to do the work that is required to do it in time. It is a lot like working towards exams in November – you know they are coming so you do the work.

4. Break them down
One problem I have is that I stress about everything way too much. I think about work and tax and staying fit and then on top of that I stress about when I am going to find time to achieve my dreams and goals. However, I have found that if you write them down, give them a time line and then break them down into smaller chunks the stress really dissipates. [Read more…] about How to Work a Job and Still Attain Your Life’s Goals and Dreams

Originally posted on May 28, 2008 @ 3:23 am

Is Your Work Life Taking Over? How to Make More Time for You

I have noticed lately that my work has been taking over my whole life. The responsibility of owning my own business, paying bills, etc. has meant that I have been spending less time with my friends, family and hobbies. Last week I realized that it was getting out of hand and made a decision to find some ways to spend more time on me and my loved ones. In this post I want to show you how you can find more time for you.

How to make more time for you

It is very important to make time for yourself and the things you deem to be important. If we allow it to, money will take over our lives and we will have nothing of substance left. I see this happen to people all the time with work, study, etc. The focus only on that at the expense of everything else.

Here some things I have been doing lately to make more time for myself.

1. Get up early
A while ago I made the commitment to get up at 6am everyday without exception. At the moment the most important past time in my life is my meditation practice. However, between working and paying bills I never seem to get the amount of time to meditate that I would like. So I decided to get up earlier.

The reason this was so important for me is because I was making myself anxious. During the day I would think to myself “Oh I am going to have NO time to meditate again” and get really stressed. By waking up early and meditating I am taking a lot of pressure off my routine because I know I have done the most important thing in my day first.

If you think you might want to get up early you should read this post on how to wake up fresh. Many people don’t wake up early because they struggle to get into the routine. However, with a few handy tips like these you might find it a little bit easier.

Waking up early is also the perfect way to get some exercise into your day. Take a look at this post on how to exercise before work everyday.

2. Work only designated hours
These days it seems as though the 9 to 5 job is becoming rarer and rarer. At least in my life, I seem to think about work 24 hours a day. If you run your own business you will know what I mean – you think about the damn think every moment of the day.

It is very important, however, to only work in designated hours. If you allow yourself to think about work all day you will drive yourself mad!

What I decided to do was work until 4pm and then not think about it until 8am the next day. I effectively banned myself from working after 4pm. This was a very positive move. It means that I am now able to forget about work when I am not at work and as such give my family, friends and hobbies 100% of my attention. This is vital for successful relationships.

3. Give yourself specific time for things
Now that you have given your work a specific time in your day it is also a good idea to do the same for your other activities. The point is not to make your life 100% planned out and structured but to give you some guidelines so you can see when things are going to occur.

You see, if things are written down and planned you usually stop thinking about them. If you can see a calendar on your desk that shows you when you are working, when you are going to the gym, when you are having rest, etc. you will be much less worried about trying to fit all of those things in.

4. Plan specific time for doing nothing


Creative Commons License photo credit: Josh Russell

One of the most important things you can do is give yourself planned time for doing nothing. This is not lazy. This is healthy. Laziness is when you don’t do things because you couldn’t be bothered. Actually planning time to do nothing is an important part of any healthy work life.

I like to give myself an hour after dinner. I eat my meal and then sit down with Mrs. Daily Minder and watch television or go for a walk. During this time I am just with her, not thinking about work and not stressing about life. This has really helped my mind.

5. Become more efficient at work
One of the main reason my work takes over is because I don’t work as hard as I should during work hours and then I stress about how little I have got done. I am sure we are all guilty of this.

Becoming more efficient at work is one of the best things you can do if you want to stop your work from taking over your life. If you get more done during the day you will be less likely to have to take work home with you or think about it when the day has finished.

Some tips for becoming more efficient at work include:

  • Work for 20 minutes and then take a three minute break
  • Eat only light and healthy foods so your mind stays clear
  • Get into a better sleeping pattern
  • Don’t take on more work than you can handle
  • Meditate

Work is only part of life and should not become the main focus. Family, friends and our passions should always come first otherwise we run the risk of living a life that is not what we intended. If you have any other tips that might help someone stop their work from taking over their life then please leave a comment.

top image:Creative Commons License photo credit: daviddave

Originally posted on May 18, 2008 @ 5:41 am

The Mercedes Benz Driving Monk: Are You Like Him?

I wanted to ask a quick question today. Are you like the monk in this commercial? Or are you like the other car driver? Take a look:

Some people go through work and life without giving any thought to the beings around them that they are affecting. Are you one of those people?

Originally posted on May 12, 2008 @ 2:34 pm

Concentration Boosting Foods: 5 Foods That Help You Concentrate and Focus at Work

Ginkgo biloba, ginseng, caffeine… there are a whole range of foods out there that are supposed to help us concentrate more. But do they really do anything? Do these substances really affect how well you can concentrate or how well you can retain information?

In this article I want to take a look at some foods that are commonly thought to help improve concentration and then look at whether they do anything at all.

Foods that help you concentrate and focus at work

1. Ginkgo Biloba


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Ginkgo Biloba is probably the most famous concentration food around. It is actually from the oldest tree species on the planet and is used to treat concentration problems, dementia, etc. The good thing about Ginkgo is that there are quite a few solid scientific studies that show that Ginkgo actually does work as a “brain herb”. The way it does this is by increasing blood flow to the brain and nourishing the cells and so on.

2. Ginseng


Creative Commons License photo credit: Jean-François Chénier

Ginseng is probably the most famous Chinese herb and is derived from a Greek word which means “all healing”. According to ancient literature this herb will work wherever it is needed. If someone has a high temperature it will lower it. If you have a low temperature it will increase it.

Ginseng is also supposed to be good for concentration and memory function. Some studies have shown that the properties in some ginseng strands increased protein synthesis in the brain and thus concluded that it is good for memory and concentration. However, these studies were carried out in the 60’s and many believe they were flawed. Recent studies have shown that ginseng does absolutely nothing for energy, concentration or memory.

Ginseng has been used for thousands of years in Chinese medicine. I have a lot of respect for this discipline and feel that there must be some benefits if these doctors continue to use it. Scientific studies are often very narrow and limited. If you are going to use ginseng I would suggest only doing so on a Chinese doctors recommendation.

3. Coffee


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Coffee. The most popular drug in the world. Millions of people around the world enjoy a cup of coffee every morning because they believe that it wakes them up and helps them stay alert and awake at work. And they are right. Coffee has caffeine and antioxidants that, when combined, improve alertness and as such concentration and better information retention.

However, recent studies have shown that the more often you drink coffee the less effective it can become. Doctors now say that it is better to have a cup when you feel like you need it and not have it every day just because it is a habit. This will ensure it wakes you up when you need it to.

4. Brahmi (Bacopa Monnieri)
Now this is one herb that I personally vouch for. I am not saying it is safe or effective for everyone, but it has worked for me.

Bacopa monneieri is an Indian Ayurvedic medical herb that is used to treat anxiety, stress and as an intelligence booster. It is said to improve concentration as well as nourishing the brain. And scientific studies (although rare) have supported this information. It has been shown to improve brain function.

I have been using it for about two month and have noticed a tangible difference in my stress levels, concentration ability and general wellbeing. Perhaps if you are after some of these benefits you might want to give it a go. Here is the brand I have been using.

5. Fish
The omega-3 fatty acids in fish as supposed to help improve your brain function over the long term. Like most of these substances, the effects usually take a long time to build up. Some foods will help you concentrate in the short term (coffee) and others take a long time (fish, brahmi, etc.).

The downside on eating fish is that the omega-3 rich fishes usually are those that live in the deep sea. These fish are nowadays often laced with mercury thanks to the pollution of the sea and are thus not all that healthy. For this and a few other personal reasons I rarely ever eat fish.

Conclusion

The subject of concentration foods is really tricky. Some people swear by them and other people say that it is all nonsense. The hard part is that the science is conflicting – there is no right or wrong answer. In situations like this we often have to turn to experience – testing it for ourselves.

Have you got any experience with these foods? Let us know.

top image:Creative Commons License photo credit: Electric Spam

Originally posted on May 12, 2008 @ 3:29 am

Boring Meetings: How to Survive Those Long Board Meetings

We all know those meetings at work where you are so bored you think you might just cut your own ears off so you don’t have to listen any longer. However, instead of going to that extreme there are some things you can do to help you survive those long and boring work meetings.

How to survive those long and boring meetings at work

1. Don’t say a single word
One of the best pieces of advice I have ever heard came from a Tibetan Buddhist Lama I know. He was forced to attend management meetings at the local buddhist center which he really did not enjoy. He disliked the politics and the petty bickering and he was frustrated by the fact that nothing ever got sorted out.

One day a friend of mine who equally disliked the meetings asked him for some advice. His response was priceless:

“Don’t say a single word. Not one. I have noticed that the meetings finish much faster!”

He then sat in the meeting with a wry smile on his face. It soon finished. This advice has served me very well. Sometimes people seem to call meetings for the sake of having meetings. Nothing gets done so why drag it on? Say nothing.

2. Get interested
On the flip side of number one it can be a good idea to get involved and interested in what is going on in the meeting. Often times we really don’t care about what is being discussed so we sit there waiting for it all to be over.

However, if we do a little preparation before hand and take a bit of an interest in the meeting it can become a wonderful opportunity to make some changes around the office. If you present things in the right way you can often get the ball rolling on something exciting and new. It might be a new water cooler or it might be a new process for doing a task that is presently outdated and slow.

Try getting interested. Force it!

3. Don’t go
One thing I have done once or twice is send a note to the meeting organizer explaining that you cannot attend because you have another important meetings scheduled for that time and there is no way you can change it.

Missing meetings like this is wonderful. You avoid all the boredom. However, it is not a strategy that you can do every single time there is a meeting or sooner or later someone will realize that something is up.

Give it a go every now and then and see what happens.

4. Meditate
Here at The Daily Mind we are all about making the daily grind more meaningful. And we know that one of the best ways to make work meaningful is to meditate while you are working. It could be a breathing meditation or it could be a meditation on concentration. Whatever it is board meetings actually present a great practice opportunity.

One of the best meditations to do in a board meeting is that of “awareness”. The idea is to keep your mind focussed on the task at hand without wavering. This is hard to do at the best of times but even harder when the subject matter is boring and dry. However, try listening very hard to everything that people say. Don’t let your mind wander onto other topics like what they are wearing, how yellow their teeth are or what you are going to eat for lunch. Every time your mind wanders simply bring it back to the topic at hand.

As you progress you will find that you can focus a lot easier and boring subjects will not seems as dull because you are focusing on them fully.

After all… the reason we find meetings boring is because we are thinking about being somewhere else!

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Originally posted on April 22, 2008 @ 2:17 pm