Last week, we talked about how ego can be harming your relationships. You may not be aware of it, but your ego may be getting in the way – or worse, actively destroying your relationships.
Hopefully, the preceding post has helped you in evaluating your relationships and whether your ego is getting in the way.
Today, let’s look at how to let go of ego in relationships and consequently improve them.
Understand your true self.
At the bottom of letting go of or controlling your ego is knowing your true self. What do you love most about yourself? What do you value most?
This is not easy and will take some time, but learn to understand and know your self-worth. Identify your core values and your goals.
Don’t let others get in the way of that, and you’ll realize that your ego need not be destructful.
Remember that you don’t have to be always right.
It’s okay to be wrong. No one is perfect.
Understanding your true self will help you realize that you cannot be right in every situation. There will always be situations where you make a wrong call, have a wrong attitude, or simply on the wrong side. Learn to discern these situations, and don’t be afraid to admit that you are wrong.
It might be difficult in the beginning, but being able to admit when you’re wrong gives a sense of freedom.
Overcome the need to be better than everyone else.
An ego out of control leads you to think that you are better than everyone else. That you are superior in every way.
Just like remembering that you don’t have to be right all the time, understand that your need to be superior to everyone around you does not have to be.
There will always be someone better, more beautiful, smarter, faster. From infanthood to adulthood, this has always been the case.
The sooner you realize that you cannot – and should not feel obligated to – be better than others, the sooner you can mend and improve your relationships.
Instead of competing with others in this way, why not think of making yourself better instead? Focus on how you can improve yourself, and your relationships will fall into place.
Practice tolerance and determine not to be easily offended.
A huge ego is easily offended, which can easily lead to arguments and even a falling out. In order to let go of your ego, you have to consciously practice tolerance and make it a point to make “being offended” the last thing on your mind.
This does not mean that you put aside your sense of self-worth. Instead, it is creating a mindset that people may be different from you and have different ways of expressing themselves. It is NOT thinking that everyone is out to get you or insult you. It is truly knowing what and who you are.
“No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.” ~Eleanor Roosevelt
Just as you can set your mind to being more tolerant and not being offended easily, you can set your mind to being content with what you have. Having this mindset can help you cover all of the points above. Knowing that you have what you need – and that most other things are superfluous – will help you be more open to what others have to say and understand how they behave.
How has your ego been harming you and your relationships? Do you think the points above can help you let go of your ego? What are other things you can do to let go of your ego?